NAKED & RADICALLY HONEST…

Excerpts from my blogs over the last 5 years…. lots of interesting things!

Accept everything about yourself - I mean everything, you are you and that is the beginning and the end - no apologies, no regrets.

Nov. 7, 06 - after my sister passed away from cancer on Oct. 26th ‘06…. Treytan was 2-1/2, Matthew was 5….

My kids are having a hard time with losing their auntie. TJ asks repeatedly, daily, hourly sometimes, if Candice is at Walmart, “Tacos Bells”, The doctor, or coming to visit. Matthew has decided that she is at the doctor in heaven and near as I can figure he is pretty sure she will be back for Christmas. I asked him if he understands what dying means, and his reply was, “It means that no one will ever be happy again.”

June 06:

Ben Franklin was criticized for flying a kite in an electrical storm. President George W. Bush was criticized for declaring war on Osama Bin Laden. You will be criticized for making excellence your goal, sharing your faith, taking a stand, accepting a leadership position, not compromising your principles, speaking out or implementing change.

A successful man is one who can lay a firm foundation with the bricks others have thrown at him.” — David Brinkley –

“You will be criticized. So it might as well be for doing the right thing.”

“If you’re willing to stand apart from the crowd, you’re putting yourself in a vulnerable position, so count on some degree of criticism.”

“Criticism is something you can avoid easily by saying nothing, doing nothing, and being nothing.”

If you are a creative person, committed to excellence, you’ll be surrounded by critics.

July 11th 2005: I am still struggling with how horrible people can be. I read somewhere that spiritual people are especially hurt because they are more free than others to risk vulnerability. Caring and loving for them is not an option but a necessity, a vocation. I definitely think that reaching out to others has always been a vocation for me. And there are those who would say “toughen up”. But you know, to hurt is human. Jesus hurt very deeply. To put on a tough front, to me, is to act arrogant. That isn’t me.

October 05: R-E-S-P-E-C-T
Sock it to me! Is that how that goes?
I must say that regarding the topic of respect, I am so saddened by the lack of it in this world anymore. Honest people don’t seem to be respected for their opinions, while brown nosers and butt kissers are respected like mad.

April 07:

Life Is A Gift
Today before you think of saying an unkind word - Think of someone who can’t speak.

Before you complain about the taste of your food - Think of someone who has nothing to eat.

Before you complain about your husband or wife - Think of someone who’s crying out to God for a companion.

Today before you complain about life - Think of someone who went too early to heaven.

Before you complain about your children - Think of someone who desires children but they’re barren.

Before you argue about your dirty house, someone didn’t clean or sweep -
Think of the people who are living in the streets.

Before whining about the distance you drive - Think of someone who walks the same distance.

And when you are tired and complain about your job - Think of the unemployed, the disabled and those who wished they had your job.

But before you think of pointing the finger or condemning another - Remember that not one of us are without sin and we all answer to one maker.

And when depressing thoughts seem to get you down - Put a smile on your face and thank God you’re alive and still around.
Don’t take your friends and family for granted, they are blessings
Life is a gift… Live it… Enjoy it… Celebrate it… And fulfill it.

NOVEMBER 06: A good example of one of my “tantrums” when I say things that I am pretty sure people don’t SERIOUSLY think I will do (such as MOVE TO ZIMBABWE!!!!)
——- I am so so so angry. I am angry at my husband. I am angry at every person I have ever been irritated by. I am angry at Kelly Ripa for gosh sake. And I am very angry at God. My husband isn’t making this all better and he is supposed to. Every person I have ever been irritated by should be gone and my sister should still be here. I think Kelly Ripa is a little bitch and I liked her before last week but I do not like her anymore now. She is a hypocrite and a snotty little twit and the way she treated Clay Aiken before, during, and after her show is despicable. Yes I can see not wanting to get germs during flu season but then #1 Don’t kiss everyone and their neighbor’s dog (which she does) and #2 Don’t put your hand over people’s mouths on your show and then turn around and call it unacceptable when someone does it to your big trap. HELLO! OK so, enough of that. Finally I am really pissed at God and I think that it was a horrible choice to take my sister. Everyone loved her. She was everyone’s favorite everything. Favorite sister, favorite aunt, favorite cousin, favorite employee, SERIOUSLY she was favored by ALL. She was a giver. She was a wonderful person. She had a lot of good left to do on earth. Why didn’t he take someone else? Someone who everyone doesn’t love or someone who does bad things? I know that these questions are really silly but, it’s how I feel and I can’t figure out how to get over it.

Well I spose that is enough “reminiscing” for now….. Oh HAPPY DAY!!!!! It’s my lil Treytan Jo’s 6th Birthday today!!

12 July 2005
Movin’ On Up
OK - that is enough moping around about how rotten other people can be. Time to move on out and get on with life. I am tired of them and done focusing on yuckies and why they are they way they are. They are all free to stay yucky and be miserable. I am getting better and moving on and I am doing it without them, thank God. Who wants yucky people on a journey with you? Talk about a way to make a trip sheer misery. Ha ha!

If you can picture a car pulling over to the side of the road… the door opens… out flies some luggage and bags… out flies a couple purses…. then out plops a couple of people who look like hell and have horns on their head. The car rips away, blowing dust all over them. The happy passengers yell out the window “Hasta la Vista” while the ex-passengers stick up their thumbs and look for the next vehicle of people to weigh down and torture with their ill will and bad manners.

Bub-bye now! I may never see you again. But, that is your choice. I can’t drag you and I can’t drag myself down trying to save your butt while you kick and scream and scratch my eyes out.

Song playing in the background, one of my favorites from my college days…

“Movin’ On Up” by Primal Scream

I was blind, now I can see
You made a believer, out of me
I was blind, now I can see
You made a believer, out of me

I’m movin’ on up now
Gettin’ out of the darkness
My light shines on
My light shines on
My light shines on

I was lost, now I’m found
I believe in you, I’ve got no bounds
I was lost, now I’m found
I believe in you, I got no bounds

I’m movin’ on up now
Gettin’ out of the darkness
My light shines on
My light shines on
My light shines on

posted by ~ Tarra ~ @ 3:14 PM

Remembering Romans 3:23 it says “For all have sinned and fall short of the Glory of God” & feeling very convicted. So blessed by so many WONDERFUL people in my life but some days too blind to see it. & So thankful God loves me, gives me peace, will never leave me, and He has given me the free gift of salvation even though I do not deserve it.

Treytan is doing okay. In school he seems to be doing well. He gets headaches some & has been complaining about his tummy hurting often. We will not know what this could be from until we get to that appt on May 6th when they will do the CT Scan to see if the shunt system is working. Hopefully we will find out why he went completely blind in one eye, and hopefully it will NOT damage sight in his other eye. There has been some discussion of teaching him brail because learning it BEFORE losing all sight is best, and even if he doesn’t lose anymore sight (PRAYING!!!) it would be an excellent skill for him to have and one that not many others do have. I just want to say THANK YOU so very deeply to his school, teachers, principal, you are all an incredible blessing to him and to us as a family.

The weather has been so beautiful. The kids are outside all the time. Our yard is bare, but they love playing in the dirt and on/around a big old tree stump, half ripped out of the ground by the tornado last summer. We hope to get some sort of fence up for protection/safety, and some yard fun for them, maybe even for Treytan’s birthday on April 28th. There is a lot of debris from the tornado still all over this place. (Our house sits where one was completely destroyed by the tornado last summer. With our luck we decided it was a GREAT place to put a house because what are the chances of a tornado hitting here twice??) Having moved here in October we did not see it all til now. Glass, nails, insulation, etc… Lots to clean up before kids are going barefoot in the yard.

Matt will be painting airbrush tattoos on kids who come to the SBMC bike & car show this weekend at the rec center so if you are there be sure to stop & say hi!!!

Wishing you love, peace, joy, & LOTS of sunshine!!

TARRA HARTL ~ Not “naked” but, radically honest even though sometimes it gets me into trouble!!!

Easter has come & gone! We had a nice Easter weekend. Saturday I had to work all day but after work we dyed eggs with our kids & great niece Isabella. Sunday morning we went to church where we got to visit with several very special people including Pastor Lisa, who Treytan thinks is pretty extra nice since she sent him some cards in the mail. Then we went to dinner at Grandma Dell’s house where we got to see all the uncles & several cousins. It was fun AND they had a fun egg hunt for the kids. Treytan did well & only complained of his tummy hurting one time.

Today was Treytan’s 5th day back @ school. He has had a great week aside from being really really pooped out in the evenings. He either just crashes OR if he fights it & stays up any past 7:30-8:00 he turns into a bear!! Not a really extra nice cuddly bear but a mean monster bear who growls & scares us!! That being said, we are working on getting him to sleep early in the evenings. He is so excited in the mornings to go to school he tries to go at 7:15! He tries to go in his pj’s! Today he got all dressed & I said good job & off he went & only did I realize after school here he had on the same shirt he wore yesterday. Oh well… no harm.

The kids have been walking to & from school in this beautiful weather. They play outside ALL the time, which is great but always a challenge with “in town” life (which is new to us… 13 years in the country & now 6 months in town so far). We seem to have at least half the neighborhoo​d at our house all the time & there always is someone in there who is throwing something or hitting with sticks & that really worries us with Treytan’s head. We can’t get the yard fenced soon enough!!

Yesterday I got a phone call from a gal who met 3 of the kids at the barber shop while Treytan was in the hospital. Grandma Dell told her about Treytan & she had been thinking about him ever since. She said she had something for him & wanted me to bring him by after school. So we drove to her house & she was out by the street waiting, with a ginormous bunny in her arms (the stuffed kind thank God). She said the Easter bunny had dropped it off at the wrong house & gave him to Treytan. He was pretty tickled about that & loves his HUGE bunny!

Today a big box came via UPS for Treytan. He got home from school & opened it to find TONS of beanies! He was thrilled!! Our friend Penny & her daughter Callie sent their beanie baby collection for Treytan. He loves them all, even the Baboon, who came with a note explaining that his behind is colored different & it’s not because he doesn’t wipe!! ha ha! He says his very favorite one is the bat, “Batty”.

All in all he is doing well. He came home today needing medicine for a headache. We worry about the tantrum-lik​e thing that he does sometimes & hope that it’s just from being tired & NOT from the shunt system not working properly. We worry because it is very out of character, & the things he says, the amount of anger he gets sometimes, is just not anything we have experienced before.

We will keep you updated. Thanks so much & have a SUPER weekend!!

Bl​essings,
The Hartl Family